If someone love you and you love someone, is it okay to accept the third person to interfere your relationship? Yes or no? Well, you may think of how your parents or Jesus Christ feel. If your man or your woman is in the Lord, then you are free to be in love. Or other question, must you wait until you are married? Hardly, many people think that sex before marriage is okay. I studied the word "fornication" that I will write it on the next blog tomorrow. But right now the word "fornication" is the meaning of this chapter discussing about sex before marriage.
Is there something wrong with you when you haven't taking your virginity yet? Sex is for marriage only. The Bible is clearly explain that God established marriage first and then sex. Have you ever wondering why God established marriage first and then sex? This question is hard for you to not to have sex with someone you love. But if you love God, you may want to read His Word and praise Him. Also, pray God about your effort that He wants for you and find someone who love the Lord and you. If you keep praying, you will get the answer which is beautiful.
Feel loved is natural. But love is something we are taught. God is love. I have no idea why love is limited. Well, if anyone accept Jesus Christ as their Saviour, then they are saved. Thus, you are a Christian, you can date any Christian man or Christian woman you want. After marriage, you are free to have sex at anytime. But for now on you are not married yet. So, patience until the right time is worth. Because of you don't want God to get angry at you, right? Why not? Oh, your passions can be powerful and it distracts you. Add to your peers influence your thought of premarital sex. They tell you that it is fun. Some tell you that having sex proves you are a man or a woman. You may feel pressure to experience the sexual relations.
On the contrary of popular opinion, not all people are in a hurry to give up their virginity. Why not hurry to give up your virginity? Read the scripture 1 Corinthians 6:13-20. This scripture tells you that God forbid fornication. Again the question is, why God established marriage first and then sex?
An Effect That Follows After the Primary Action of Sex
The Bible have someone who did practice the premarital sex. The prostituted woman invited a young man to enjoy having sex with her, saying, Come, let us take our fill of love until the morning: let us solace ourselves with loves. (Proverbs 7:18) But the scriptures explain that enjoy having sex today can cause pain tomorrow. Let's see what Solomon said in Proverbs 5:3, 4.
One possible happen is sexual transmitted disease (STD). Can you imagine the heartache if years later you learned that a sexual experience has caused a serious health problem? Proverbs 5:11 warns you have to groan in your future when your flesh and your organism come to an end. Having sex before marriage is also wrong. Look at the teen pregnancy for example. They are not ready to be a parent. And yes, one who engage in premarital sex is truly sin against his or her own body. Sex after marriage is best and you don't have to worry about abortion or raising a child on your own. Even condom may not works. Why not? It is because of you may never know if condom can easily tear. And about STD if happen, let's see if you can decide to sin against your own body. God is not fooled about condom. Condom don't save your virginity. Because of condom was invented by man in ancient Greek times. So, for that reason, God tell you to get married first and then sex. If you feel you need sex now, then go ahead and get married. But you get to understand that while you are single, it means that you need to learn how to cope with your patience. It's not easy, but if you have something to do or talk with someone, then everything is going to be okay with you. You will be fine without having a husband or a wife.
Guilt and Disappointment
After young people graduated from high school, many of them go to the college but some don't go to. What will happen to them? They go to the party and not do their homework. So when the party is over, many of young people have a bit of disappointment in premarital sex. Their results are feeling guilty and less of self-respect. There is no warmth of love if choosing sex over love. Its such a wrong action. They can feel sick, cheap, and dirty. So why on earth can't they stop before things went too far? Since such reactions are nothing new that the doctor said. After he studied the sexual activities of 2,436 colleges students, he concluded, "Disappointed and not satisfied with their first sexual intercourse experiences. Both males and females remember that situation." In marriage, there is genuine love and commitment, such problems usually can be worked out.
The Price of Immorality
Proverbs 5:9 says, Lest thou give thine honour unto others, and thy years unto cruel:
Some people feel no guilt about having sex before marriage. So they go out and seek sex with different partners. Why are they doing that? Because of they think it is fun. Their way of right now they live, most of their abilities will waste. So these promiscuous people are low self-confidence and self-esteem.
Once the couple had illicit sex, they stared at each other differently. A man find that his feelings for the woman are not the same as before; he even find her less attractive. A woman on the other hand, feel exploited. Do you want to know what happened to Amnon and Tamar? If so, let's read 2 Samuel 13:15.
Maria had the same experience. After she had sex with her boyfriend, she admitted to hate herself...hate him. They thought would bring them closer ended their relationship. She didn't even want to see him again.
In fact, the unmarried couple who have sex are more likely to break up than are those who abstain! The reason is, illicit sex cause to jealousy and distrust. This is not a genuine love. Recall the beautiful scripture 1 Corinthians 13:4, 5 that I wrote about love in November.The love is building the relationships that remain based on passion.
Chastity Benefits Everyone With Peace and Self-Respect
Staying chaste can help you avoid the serious consequences. The Bible tells about a young woman who are not married and are not having sex continue to stay chaste despite intense love for her boyfriend. She deserved to be a pure one. Her own peace of mind contributed to the contentment between the two of them.-Song of Solomon 6:9, 10; 8:9, 10
The virginity is like a diamond. It's valuable with inner peace and self-respect. But how can you get to know your partner well if he or she don't have sex? Just wonder that.
Build the Lasting Intimacy
Sex alone cannot last in a relationship forever; neither can express your affection, such as kissing. Will you miss kissing someone if after you have broken up from your boyfriend or your girlfriend? Ann warned that she learned from experience you can get too close physically too soon. Spending the time hiding affection upon each other, meaningful communication stops. Later Ann began to date another man, she was careful to avoid becoming too intimate physically, eventually they got married. Ann explained that they spent their time working out problems and discussing their goals in life. Ann got to know what type of person she was marrying. After marriage, there were only pleasant surprises.
Is it hard for you and your boyfriend or your girlfriend to show such self-control? Yes or no? The answer is yes that you confess. Because of it's natural to feel affected. But you want very much to please God and not spoil your upcoming marriage. The emphasis of sex before marriage is self-gratification. Mutual respect is weak by not controlling the passion. Such selfish, hard to break and can eventually ruin the relationship.
But in marriage, a healthy intimate relationship needs to be self-control. You need to focus on giving up the sexual activity. (1 Corinthians 7: 2-5) Staying chaste helps you develop such self-control. It teaches you how not to act selfish over your own desires. Remember, too, that marital satisfaction is not purely due to physical factors. A woman have feelings of intimacy, closeness, and dependability and upon her husband's ability to identify with his wife, and...how much confidence she had in him.
Interestingly, the people who had sex before marriage were difficulty during the first two weeks of marriage. Add to have the histories of long-term premarital sex. It shows that those have sex before marriage are twice as likely to commit adultery after marriage! This truly what Hosea 4:11 say!
For that reason, 'you will reap what you sow.' If you sow self-control, you will reap a harvest of fidelity and security. A married man of several years is joyful to come home to his wife and know that he and his wife belong only to each other. Nothing can interfere their love and confidence.
Thus, if you wait until you are married, you can enjoy peace of mind, knowing you are pleasing to God. Still, so far staying chaste these days is not easy. How help you to stay chaste? The next chapter will explain how to say No to premarital sex. I will post it tomorrow. Okay, have a good night. And if you are single and wanting to get married, stay strong. Talk to your God about your situation. Xo, Loi